White House pranksters wrap-up Karl Rove's car, career

In the wake of his recent resignation a few mischievous White House staffers decided to wrap-up Karl Rove's Jaguar while he was away in Texas and traveling with President Bush.

Two stuffed eagle toys were mounted on the trunk and signs posted on the car read "King Karl" and "I love Obama."

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New Film of the Week: Miss Teen USA 2007 of South Carolina fields a challenging question

Recent polls show a fifth of Americans can't find the United States on a world map. Care to explain? Check out the latest Film of the Week of South Carolina's Miss Teen USA 2007...

Afghanis outraged over "blasphemous balls"

Angry residents in Khost, Afghanistan are holding demostrations accusing US troops of insulting Islam after they dropped soccer balls into the province bearing the name of Allah.

The blasphemous balls showed the Saudi Arabian flag which features the shahada, or the Koranic declaration of faith-- a revered symbol of Islam, not to be kicked by anyone.

The local leaders, mullahs and elders of the province urged the US Military to respect their culture by parading through the center of the village, shouting: "We will not kick," to which around 100 residents responded: "The United States' balls."

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Robot Chicken Star Wars parody

This might be the funniest thing we've seen in a while...

Barry Bonds' 756th home run ball may result in big tax bill

21-year-old Matt Murphy snagged a valuable piece of sports history when he caught Barry Bonds' 756th home run. By most estimates, the ball would sell in the half-million dollar range on the open market or at auction. It therefore places Murphy in the highest tax bracket for individual income, where he may face a tax rate of about 35 percent, or about $210,000 on his $600,000 baseball. Kind of sucks eh?

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"Fishyslapper" added to the colloquial dictionary

The word "fishyslapper"-- defined as "sexual impotence due to alcohol or drug induced inebriation"-- has been added to Grundlecrank's colloquial dictionary. (E.g. "We were at the bar so long I ended up giving her a fishyslapper.")

American Beer month is over, Old E takes the prize

The polls are in and it seems Olde English 800 is The Crank's favorite forty. Garnering four of eleven votes, Old E just squeaked past Billy Dee William's choice-- Colt 45-- and Steel Reserve 211 High Gravity, which both received a whopping three votes.

Sadly, Notorious BIG's pick, Private Stock, sunk to the bottom of the polls, receiving only one vote. It looks like the days of "smokin' weed and bamboo" and "sippin' on private stock" really left with the matching hat and "red and black lumberjack" look. R.I.P. Mr. Wallace.

Guess who's back, guess who's back, guess who's back

For those of you who may be following the website, all of us here at Grundlecrank would like to apologize for our week long absence. Like everyone else, we've been reading Harry Potter, working "in the real world," and catching a tan. But we're glad to be back!